Peanut Butter Cookies For David

October 23, 2010

Today is my brother’s birthday. I wanted to bake for him. He died almost three years ago, very suddenly, just before Christmas. I miss him every day – his raucous laugh, his bear hugs, his passion for life, music, food and travel. He would have been twenty-eight today.

I can’t bear that he never got to experience all that he should have – to grow as the great musician and composer that he was, to get married (he was such a hopeless romantic), to have children and be a father (he would have been an amazing dad), and to live.

When I was four and he was seven, always enjoying food 🙂

When I was 15 and he was 18, on New Years Eve.

His favourite cookies as a child were peanut butter cookies. I have recently fallen in love with this recipe, by Heidi Swanson. I know David would have loved them. These are for him.

Natural Peanut Butter

Wholemeal flour

Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Pure Maple Syrup

Stir to just combine, still “dusty” with flour

I added a touch of coarse sea salt

Happy Birthday, David. Love, Bud.

Heidi xo
  • laurak October 23, 2010 at 6:58 pm

    Hi Heidi, I have been following your blog for a little while, I just wanted to say what a beautiful post this is! What a lovely and thoughtful way to honor your brother's memory.
    They look delicious!
    Laura 🙂

  • Heidi October 23, 2010 at 7:28 pm

    Thanks, Laura 🙂

  • Emma October 23, 2010 at 8:23 pm

    It's a beautiful post Heidi, thinking of you and your family today xxx

  • ClaireyH October 23, 2010 at 8:51 pm

    hi Heidi

    veer sorry to hear that you have to live with the loss of your brother, your whole family must miss him terribly and it is lovely to know that you can come up with little things to remember him with.

    This is a superb post, I am sure your brother would be very proud of you, and love this biscuits too!

  • Jenny October 23, 2010 at 8:56 pm

    You write beautifully Heidi, I always love reading your blog.
    Happy Birthday David – I hope you are peaceful wherever you are x

  • Chanel11 October 23, 2010 at 8:59 pm

    I can't imagine what life would be like without my baby brother, I'm so sorry to hear that your brother's life was cut so unfairly short. But I'm sure that wherever he is, he is smiling about his cookie dedication 🙂

  • Mary October 23, 2010 at 9:03 pm

    I'm sorry to hear of the loss of your brother, I know how hard it is to live with the loss of an immediate family member. I think it's lovely that you can honour your brother with these biscuits. I'm sure he is looking down on you and smiling.

  • Heidi October 23, 2010 at 9:08 pm

    Thanks, Em. love you xo

    Clairey, thank you – I know he would love these 🙂

    Thanks, Jenny. That's really sweet.

    Chanel, that's lovely to think. I hope so xo

  • Heidi October 23, 2010 at 10:20 pm

    Thanks, Mary 🙂

  • Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella October 24, 2010 at 2:34 am

    Beautiful post Heidi! It is really so sweet and I'm sorry to hear that you lost your brother but what a beautiful way to honour his memory 🙂

  • Kath October 24, 2010 at 9:10 am

    It's so sad when we have to let go somebody we love so much, especially at such a young age.

    What a lovely post, Heidi! I believe he knows. And would've loved your cookies.

  • littleaspects October 24, 2010 at 9:20 am

    Heidi, I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. This is a beautiful post. The biscuits are a lovely way to honour him. xo

  • Denita October 24, 2010 at 10:58 am

    That's a wonderful post Heidi.Thinking of you all. Lots love, De xx

  • Leah October 24, 2010 at 1:06 pm

    Heidi, this is such a beautiful post. I can't imagine what life would be like without my brother.

    I am so sorry that he was taken away from this world so young. The incredible pain you and your family must feel from his passing. I am so sorry.

    I do believe that he would of loved the PB Cookies they look sensational, love the addition of the coarse sea salt before baking!
    My thoughts are with you Heidi…xoxo

  • Heidi October 24, 2010 at 1:25 pm

    Thanks lovelies, you're all very sweet 🙂 I just knew I had to bake for him yesterday. Thanks for all your kind words, it means a lot. I'm glad you've enjoyed the cookies too 🙂
    Heidi xo

  • ♥Lola October 24, 2010 at 2:07 pm

    Hello lovely 🙂 I read this post yesterday and didn't think anything I could have written would suffice. I couldn't imagine how hard it would be to lose someone so special. I just wanted to pop back and say that I'm thinking of you and that your blog has really made a positive impact on me.

    I get really excited when you post and have made everyone of your recipes without fail 🙂 I'll take extra care with these biscuits x

    MBee.

  • Heidi October 24, 2010 at 2:28 pm

    Oh, Lola, you're a doll 🙂 thank you xo

  • The InTolerant Chef October 24, 2010 at 3:26 pm

    What a lovely post. When you one day produce a cookbook you could call these David's Cookies and tell his story, keeping his memory alive through food and sharing it with the world.

  • hollypop October 24, 2010 at 6:24 pm

    oh heidi, this nearly made me cry. he does indeed look like such a lovely person!
    your cookies look great and the photography was especially cool 🙂

  • Anna Johnston October 24, 2010 at 6:57 pm

    My brother Kris & his g/f just visited, we're super close…., so naturally, when I read your wonderful post to honour your bro David…., I couldn't help but feel for your loss. What a wonderful thing to do, celebrate your brother with a cookie..
    Big hugs
    Anna

  • Emma @CakeMistress October 25, 2010 at 12:29 am

    Sad to hear and can't imagine what it's like to lose a sibling. Beautiful tribute to your brother. x

  • Anne @ Food Loving Polar Bear October 25, 2010 at 5:37 am

    What a lovely post… I had tears in my eyes when I looked at your cookies.. they have SO much love in them 🙂

  • Lisa (bakebikeblog) October 25, 2010 at 9:04 am

    Oh sweetie – what a beautiful tribute to your brother 🙂

  • Sam McMillan October 25, 2010 at 10:16 am

    You are a wonderful sister. xo

  • imasugarjunkie October 25, 2010 at 11:49 am

    What a lovely post, I am sure your brother would be so proud of you.

  • Jennifer October 25, 2010 at 12:19 pm

    What a beautiful tribute to your brother – the post and the cookies. I am sure he would have loved them.

  • Gary & Sue Davis October 25, 2010 at 1:40 pm

    Hi, Heidi, David would love that…

    Nana & Roo, (yes & me), are all wiping tears from our eyes, we all have David in our hearts.

    You have a real talent in writing Heidi as your thoughts have been expressed & feeling in them is evident.

    Love from Sue, Gary, Nana & Roo. xxx

  • onika October 25, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    what a special post. hopefully with the cookies came memories to warm your heart. x

  • KittyCate October 25, 2010 at 9:44 pm

    Heidi, I am so truly sorry to hear of your loss. The thought of losing a much-loved sibling brings tears to my eyes. You write so beautifully, this is a truly gorgeous tribute to David.
    Much love xx

  • Hannah October 26, 2010 at 12:01 pm

    Oh Heidi. I don't even know what to say, except that I feel for you so deeply and wish I could give you a hug. I'm so sorry. I'm sure your brother would have loved these cookies, particularly because of the love they express. xoxo

  • Iron Chef Shellie October 26, 2010 at 9:35 pm

    awwww so sweet! and I love the look of those cookies!

  • A cupcake or two October 27, 2010 at 8:02 pm

    Hi Heidi, I was searching for a delicious Peanut Butter Cookie recipe and came across your blog. It really touched me. So sorry for your loss. I have a brother and I just couldn't imagine life without him. I'm sure David would have loved these cookies. Thank you for sharing your story and also this recipe.

  • Bee November 29, 2010 at 7:47 pm

    Heidi I'm so sorry I didn't see this earlier. It was a really beautiful post and I am so sad that David isn't here to share more memories with you.

    I think it's really sweet that you can make something he loved and remember that he is around you. Happy Birthday David.

    x