Happenings 30.1.20
DOING: sitting beside sleeping Walt. I’ve answered emails and organised some work for my ABC Life column, and he’s still asleep! So, I get to write.
HEARING: as you probably already know, I’m a fan of Janet Lansbury and the way she helps parents respectfully care for their children, embrace challenging behaviours and set boundaries. Most (not all) of her work really resonates with me. This recent podcast episodes with Dr Tina Payne Bryson (who has co-authored some great books with Dan Siegel) was particularly brilliant. During the interview, Dr Bryson described a child’s tantrumy behaviour as “dysregulated” and, honestly, it’s changed my life. Because even though I’m usually empathetic towards my children when they have big emotions, it can be hard to stay calm, patient and open when they’re overwhelmed (especially if they’re being aggressive). Now, whenever Joan is struggling, the word “dysregulated” will instantly pop up in my mind , and I’ve found it SO much easier to give her the love and connection she needs.
This month I’ve also listened to a bunch of episodes of the podcast How To Fail, which I discovered via Molly. I loved the interviews with Andrew Scott and Samin Nosrat. Nigel Slater is next!
DRINKING: a coffee. It’s 9:58am and I’ve already been up for six hours. Six hours! Walt woke at 4am, chatting to me in his adorable language, and wouldn’t stop. I am so, so tired. I’ll be mildly devastated when I finish this coffee - it’s my second and I limit myself to two a day, just so I don’t end up drinking nineteen (it feels like a slippery slope there, folks).
EATING + COOKING: this weekend we stocked up on our favourite Flinders Sourdough bread at the Farmer’s Market, so we’ve been eating lots of beautiful sourdough. Fresh salad sandwiches on the first day, and toast thereafter.
We’ve also started a new tradition of homemade pizza night. To make the pizza bases we’ve been using a recipe from the Pretend Soup cookbook, which gifted to Joan last year. It’s a super easy and fun recipe to make, and quite forgiving. I use spelt flour and it works beautifully. We tend to make one pizza with a bianca base with caramelised onions and garlicky fried zucchini rounds, and one with a tomatoey base with passata, fresh tomato + capsicum (Joan’s request) and basil. We then top both with a mix of mozzarella and parmesan, and bake until golden. I don’t think I’ve seen Walt eat anything faster than he does this pizza. At the table, Ben and I top our slices with anchovies and chilli flakes. Walt is still has some trepidation around anchovies, though he LOVES sardines, salmon and tuna. When Joan is offered one it continues to be a solid no. I get it - they’re fishy. But they’re so good, especially on pizza.
Let’s see, what else… we’ve been a lot of stone fruits. Nectarines, peaches and plums, mostly. Joan and I are obsessed. Though, she no longer calls nectarines “nectaGREENS” (as she did when she was young), which saddens me a little. Walt, however, continues to be greatly offended by most fruit. Serve him a piece and he shall look at you as though you have done something completely unforgivable. He will then proceed to either throw it on the floor or smush it on the table. On the other hand, if he spots the jar of cod liver oil in the fridge he will shout - arms raised, as though having a conniption - and beg for a taste.
Lastly, I got to pack my first lunch box for Joan this week! Gosh, that was fun. This year she’s at kinder for 5 hours, three times a week, which warrants a far bigger snack than last year, which was 2.5hours, twice a week. After doing some research on stainless steel lunchboxes that stand the test of time, I gravitated towards Planet Box, however, they’re quite pricey, so I waited until they were on sale (I got mine from Biome over a year ago). So far, we love it. For her first day she had Finn Crisps with ghee and cheese, banana bread that we’d made the day before (this recipe), Medjool dates, carrots and cucumber.
WANTING: the transition to four-year-old kinder to go as well as possible for my little love. I don’t expect it to be especially challenging for her (just the usual sort of challenging ) - nevertheless, it’s a big deal.
LOOKING: forward to going on book tour next month! We’ll be visiting Sydney, Brisbane and Canberra for a bookstore event in each city. You can read more about it on my events page (link here) and follow the links to secure a spot (the events are free but you need a ticket).
DECIDING: what to pack for our trip. I want to travel as lightly as possible.
ENJOYING: this coffee. I’m halfway through and it’s cold but still so good.
WATCHING: Ben and I have started a new series called Succession. We don’t always have time to watch an episode together, but maybe once a week we’re able to sit down for 20 minutes or so (until I fall asleep and need to go to bed) and it’s been so nice - just to sit together, you know? I had also started watching Years and Years on SBS, but with the devastation that has been happening across our country it all felt too real and I couldn’t watch it without feeling anxious.
READING: I don’t often re-read interviews I have done (I certainly don’t listen to podcast recordings) but last week I found myself scrolling over the interview I did with Not So Mumsy. It felt good to talk about the biggest lesson I’ve learned from motherhood and how I balance work with looking after my kids (the answer to the latter being I don’t work a lot and I have an enormous amount of family support). You can read the interview here.
WEARING: summer dresses. Also this skirt that my parents bought me for my birthday a couple of years ago with a white tshirt. I love a white tshirt.
BUYING: we’re trying to not spend a lot this month, as we’re about to head on this book tour and will no doubt be eating out more than usual. I’ve tried to find Air BnB places that are close to food stores, though, so we can stock up on produce and eat at our rental as often as possible.
PLANNING: what we are going to do in Sydney, Brisbane and Canberra in the days surrounding the book events. I’m super excited for this trip, which, while primarily for work (for both Ben and me), feels like a treat.
PLAYING: Walt wants nothing more than to be outside at the moment, so we’ve been spending a lot of time sweeping the front porch (his favourite activity), pottering in the garden and playing with his basketball. On days when he’s been particularly wakeful overnight, I find it immensely rejuvenating to be outdoors in the fresh air with my bare feet on the ground.
CRAVING: coffee. Always and especially today.
LOVING: these days at home with my kids. I feel like I’m right where I’m supposed to be and it’s a really good feeling.
SAVOURING: this time at home with my kids. This coffee. This life. A lot has happened in our little world, as well as the wider world, over these past few months. Awful things. Life shattering things. And I’m grateful to be here with my people, doing our best to be good humans and care for each other and this planet in a way that feels good and honourable.
FEELING: excited. Grateful. Sometimes overwhelmed. Often tired. And really, really content.
Happenings posts inspired by Pip.
Heidi xo